Reay Jespersen

This is the first time I’ve sat in the home office and watched the bird feeder we put out on the back deck. It was a present from a friend of ours. It’s a pretty highbrow affair made of cedar, with a plastic-encased centre chamber for seeds, and two narrow fry basket-type deals on either end for suet and seed squares.

So there are these two little birds - they look like sparrows, but one is pretty red on the head and breast, so I’ve got no clue what they are - that have been hanging out on our deck lately. Thus far, it looks like they’ve only been sharpening their beaks on the berry bush beside the deck (so help me, that’s what it looks like) and eating the crusty snow on the deck railing. I wasn’t sure what they’re eating, but obviously they’re surviving on something. So I thought the bird feeder would be a big hit. In my typical cinematic way of envisioning things, I saw myself putting the bird feeder out and going back inside and turning around to see it alive with birds of all kinds looking to cash in on a free meal. Such wasn’t the case, of course.

So I’m sitting here and looking back there and it doesn’t look like there have been any takers yet, at least none taking any significant amount. And the two little birds just came by, sharpened their beaks on the bush branches, ate some snow, and then - finally - took notice of the bird feeder suspended over their heads. They went to check it out, and the first one up there, rather than noticing the tray of open seeds at its feet, looked like it clonked its head on the clear plastic siding, where all the seeds are stored. Apparently, birds aren’t caught up on the concept of clear plastic.

I was thinking, though, that the sunflower seeds we stocked in the centre silo may be too big for these birds anyway. It would be like a human getting a hamburger three feet wide. But the suet squares on the side cages of the feeder have various tiny little seeds in them. Much better for wee birds, I’d think.

But now I’m wondering about the medium. I could totally see interest in a pressed square of just seeds, but having suet as the glue holding them together? Isn’t suet some kind of animal fat? Yes. Ok. It is. I just looked it up. So offering birds the seeds they so desperately want in these lean winter days but only combined with “the hard fatty tissue about the loins and kidneys of beef, sheep, etc.” seems a bit of a cruel joke.

Birds, unless I’m totally off on my recollection, aren’t big on animal byproducts. Are flocks of sparrows ever seen swarming cows to get to that succulent kidney fat? Not that I’ve ever heard, which is pretty good news for cows (and really, with the lives they lead, any bit of good news will do…) So what makes people think that such a product would be a great substance to put seeds in for creatures that have no interest in it?

It strikes me as akin to marketing a treat product for cats that’s pieces of meat driven into a 2X4. Like, come on… it’s meat! Cats love meat! What does it matter what’s holding the meat together?

There’s also a distinct chance that I’m overthinking this. After all, the bird feeder industry’s been around an awful lot longer than I have, so presumably they’re onto something with the suet concept. All I know for sure is the empirical evidence that’s before me: wee birds who could use a good snack on these chilly days are going for the proverbial 3-foot hamburger instead of the smorgasbord of tiny seeds packed in (now frozen) animal fat.

More updates on this exciting topic to follow!